We used to have Halloween parties when I was growing up. There were costumes and games and sugary nonsense.

I once got through a whole packet of sweets that looked like they were bleeding – not because I liked them, but because I was trying to identify what they tasted like.

A few years later, at secondary school, I found something that was very like them in the canteen.

Blue Raspberry Panda Pops.

Ridiculously sweet, slightly sour and the sort of blue that changes the colour of your tongue – I basically lived on Panda Pops, dancing around on a sugar rush and sticking my tongue out at random people, for a couple of years at high school.

Little wonder that my dentist goes abroad more than I do.

That said, even now, as I advance towards my forties, if I was given the choice between a Panda Pop and a whole bunch of celery…

Well, can celery do this?


No, I know. Panda Pops were discontinued in 2011. Sigh.

Well, maturity beckons. Bring on the celery.

It still counts as healthy if you drown it in houmous, right?