For the last couple of Christmases, Aimée’s mother has put a stocking together for me. It’s terribly kind and lord knows, I’m a bit old for it now, but the finest thing of all was in the last one.

Macadamia nuts.

Sometimes, on the backs of wine bottles, there will be food suggestions. I’ve yet to see a wine that says it goes best with a packet of scampi fries but I’m sure I’ve read a suggestion for nuts and cheeses. I’d be quite happy to skip the wine and go straight into the nuts and cheese.

Most of us use nuts in cake, which is as it should be. Or perhaps we indulge in peanuts, bar-side, which is also – fair enough. It’s when it comes to nuts in salad that I draw the line.

There’s a bit in Fleabag, where the main character’s sister says, “Putting pine nuts on your salad doesn’t make you an adult.” When I first watched that episode, I said Fleabag’s line in chorus with her, but to the TV.


Pine nuts do, absolutely do, make you an adult.

Walnuts, by and large, are quite appalling.

Pistachios, macadamias, cashews, almonds, pecans – are rather wonderful.

Heart shape made of mixed nuts