This is an ambition post because I have never cared for red wine, but I’d like to be sophisticated (which is not to say drunk) enough to recognise the difference between Shiraz and Malbec.

I’ve always wanted to go wine tasting but there’s no way in hell I’d spit it out. Unless it was red. It is my curse. I just don’t like it.

That said, I trust myself. I can learn.

I learnt on Friday that the reason I don’t like red wine might just be that I have yet to try a good one. The best, apparently in the world, can be found in Bratislava. I have very little frame of reference for this, but I’ve been told that it’s so utterly delicious, the Slovakians don’t export it because – it’s too good to sell.

On the same night, I was told about a wine and asparagus festival, somewhere in Spain, which one of our chaps at the Legion wandered into, and unexpectedly had the time of his life.

I have asked my Chairman if we can have a wine and asparagus evening at the Club. I can imagine the posters.

It seems we might be having a wine tasting quite soon. Chances are, rather than veer too far from the traditional, we might just have wine and cheese.

I know I can cope with the cheese.