As mentioned, only yesterday, Aimée is on antibiotics. Even though there’s a new advert warning us – as a nation – not to reach for the antibiotics when we have a sniffle, because superbugs are coming and we are ill-equipped. Clearly, whatever Aimée has is powerful enough to risk taunting the superbugs into action.

Frankly, it always feels like a long day when I am tasked with driving a bottle of piss to the vets, but this is how I find myself occupied today.

Doobie, my darling little jack russell, has been peeing like a race horse every hour or so for a couple of days. The frequency with which he currently needs to go out suggests something isn’t quite right, and being raw-fed, he doesn’t drink very much.

It’s a thing. There’s enough liquid in the meat and offal to forgo a real connection to drinking water. Please don’t misunderstand me: they have plenty of fresh water in their bowls, it’s just that none of the dogs is especially thirsty. That said, the amount Doobie is producing would suggest he has a serious drink problem.

Ergo, I am driving a bottle of widdle to the vets. Getting a sample generally involves a decent aim or a measuring jug, but I left that to Aimée – I promise, I’m nice, she just happened to be up and about before me.

This, dear reader, is how I will find out if Aimée is actually reading my blog.

The bottle spilled on the passenger seat, where she normally sits. I sponged what I could but I’m not a miracle worker.

I’m sure she won’t catch anything but my attention was rather more focussed on keeping some pee in the bottle so the vet would have something to test.

I had a long chat with the girl on reception. She has small dogs, too. She’s on all the social media pages to do with little dogs. Aimée does some moderation and admin for a few of the pages and when she realised who my partner was, the receptionist went totally fangirl.

It’s an experience that somehow evades description to watch a woman go from chatty to overexcited, all while holding a bottle of dog wee. I left quite quickly.

And lo, Doobie has a water infection. He too is on antibiotics.

Apparently, I can expect his breath to smell worse and his farts to come more readily until he’s finished the course. So there’s something to look forward to.